Can anyone read this?

I don't know where we are! I don't know how long we've been here and I don't know how to get back! Is my employer anywhere out there? Marty's Master? Angel? Doyle? Wolfram and Hart? That funny looking guy who offered me a bounty on...

Look, the Greckle and me have been having a kind of enforced vacation on Mud-pie on the River, here. It's all countryside and weird races. I can't pass for a child here. They've got demons called hobbits that can do it better - even the Hobbits aren't like me. Marty Our laptops have been out of order for ages - I don't know how long. Is anyone stilllooking for us? The Greckle said we should repost what we wrote about this trip from the begining, but I haven't. I will now, more or less.

after we went through the portal we hadn't got any food or money and the water didn't smell drinkable. It didn't smell fit for a rat to swim in! We walked for miles and then we saw a little town. I thought this was a fun place when we found the bar. (They call it an Inn, here, like the Inn in Sunnydale, but it's much smaller and the roof is made out of straw! It has squirrelly animals in it.)

That's when I found out that there are plenty of people my size here. We aren't quite the same, but near enough, some of the younger males look OK. The furniture is the right size for me, too. I haven't had that since before I first went to Diran. The humans just look as big and dull and slow as they are in Sunnydale.

Everybody smokes (and I don't so that's part of the downside. I don't think pipe-weed is the same kind of tobacco that they had in Sunnydale, the smokers look too laid-back - literally, sometimes.) I ordered a drink and nobody asked me for ID! They all stared when I spoke. I had jeans on and they took me for a man until they heard my voice. The women all wear dresses. In some ways it's like Sunnydale, though. You need money anywhere.

I have that big fat wallet full of money and credit-cards that I got from my last target - but they don't have the same kind of money here. They don't recognize even the coins as cash and they laughed at the idea that paper could be money! They use gold and silver and I don't have any.

I don't want to rob anyone Firewalled in a strange town, not until I know more about it - and not while that creep Marty is around to tell the the Boss what I did, if when we ever get home back. In some ways this place is too much like where I started from. They'd notice a thief. /Firewalled

Most would know me for adult, here - I could get drinks, meals and beds to sleep in, lots of beds, I guess. But this place is too small. If they're as much like my kind as they look the women wouldn't stand for it.

(no subject)

I feel a fool reposting what happened earlier, especially when things went wrong. I came through the portal with a load of loot - everything from cash and cards to a bag of drugs and the Ring of Amara. I took that earlier Then the money was wrong, I haven't got the contacts to sell the drugs and selling the ring wasn't a good idea. The guy had some way to test it. It showed up as magic but there's no way to explain what it does, not here. I don't think they have vampires and asking questions to try to find out about that made things worse.

I got some warning. There's a skinny guy that told me that the towns-folk don't like magic rings, or strangers trying to sell them. I think I could have figured that out on my own. He said trouble was on its way. The place didn't seem to have any police or the like, but he said they have sheriffs. What they don't have is all the prisoners' rights stuff that they had in the last dimension. I don't want to find out what they've got instead.

The guy told me that there's a place where they buy magic rings and hire mercenaries, and he gave me a map. It's all in runes but he said the place is Murder, or Mulder, or maybe Mordor - whatever.

I thought the hardest thing would be telling the Greckle that we'd have to go, but he was ready for it. He says we'd do better in a bigger town and there are things we can sell.

He warned me not to steal anything as we left! I may not be one of the frimping Gig Team but I'm not an idiot! This way nobody has a real interest in hunting us down, unless the jeweller wants the ring, and he could have bought it for a higher offer. If we steal anything that matters they'd really hunt for us. I had pies off a windowsill, though. I'm hungry! But they won't hunt us for that.

I guess we'll have to find food while we're on the road. Something's already found me. I itch.. Maybe I'd better warm up. Anything can happen in a strange place.

(no subject)

I thought we'd starve, out in the wilds. We found an apple tree near the start. It was in the bushes, away from the road and not looked after. The apples were small and green and they didn't taste too good even when we tried cooking them. We were hungry enough to eat some anyway. My stomach hurt for days but he seemed to manage well enough.

They taught us to keep alive on all kinds of things, on Diran. I was thinking about grubs. That's usually a last choice, but it might be better than those apples.

Rabbits come out to feed at dusk but there's always a wind blowing and the moving plants and the creepiness unfamilar territory made it tricky to shoot them. I didn't want to waste the darts and I don't think I could find them again in the undergrowth. I gave it some thought and then we used thread from Marty's jacket, braided it, made snares and used the scent-destroying spray. We might catch a rabbit or hare or something.

When we came to the bend in the road we could hear water. I was so thirsty and I guess he was too. We left the road and headed for the sound. It was further than I thought, but I don't think the stream came from that stinking swamp by the portal. (Which way are we going, then? Water runs downhill.) We's have been dead of zootyphoid and fishpox if we'd drunk that muck.

The water's fresh, cold and good and I saw a fish. I wished we could think of a way to get at that. The I remembered about harpoons. There are frogs, too. I think I heard somewhere that the French eat frogs. I wonder how they taste?